I never asked to be a reindeer

being the only deer

in the family


there are articles                                                                       

and photos where


my yak hunting coat

seemed to be some kind


of dressage display

and my hollow hair filled


the air with midnight sun

my father believed


that kind of publicity

would only encourage stags


so we moved to a 1 bedroom

self-catering apartment


where the canopy was high

once when I found a Lappish cheese


my father reminded me

I was a symbol


of distant good fortune

around the time


I found a recipe

in his own hand


for smoked reindeer mousse

I began to dream


our flat was thick with trees

the limited light


empty of everything